On Hate, And Love: How I Stay Strong in the Face of Discrimination

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

A decade ago in 2004, I was alive for the first time in my life.

It wasn't only that I had come out and fallen in love a few years earlier, it was that I had finally come into my own.

I was writing what would become my first memoir, America's Boy. I was running marathons. I was blissfully, beautifully happy, in a Rouse Renaissance if you will, a new age of enlightenment.

And then came the dark.

I was living in St. Louis, and Missouri became the first state to enact a constitutional prohibition on gay weddings after the Massachusetts high court permitted gay marriage there. The measure was approved by 70 percent of the state's voters.

It was during that time I began to not only feel ostracized from my country but also from my faith. I felt I didn't belong, be it church, or work, or restaurants.

I entered a dark place. Gary and I made rash decisions, including ones to quit our jobs and move to Michigan.

Fast forward a decade: In spite of all the progress in our country, I found myself revisiting that nasty place recently, in light of the anti-gay legislation in Arizona and Kansas. I felt like I had growing up gay in the Ozarks: Dirty. An outcast. Unwanted.

Yes, I could rant. I could rage. I could simply laugh off the fact that it's so ridiculous that people feel it's OK to discriminate based on their religious beliefs – to hate – but it gets harder and harder.

(And, by the way, can atheists choose not to serve customers with crosses around their necks? Or pregnant women with no rings on their fingers? Can Catholics refuse Jews?)

But instead I only hear the words of my mother and grandmothers:

"People will always need someone to hate. It's all they have."



They told me this because they, at one point in their lives, experienced discrimination.

My Grandma Shipman was a Native American who married a white man.

My mother was a driven academic overachiever who, as a nurse, often challenged a doctor's orders or thinking.

My Grandma Rouse fought to allow and welcome the less fortunate, the "unworthy" and "unwanted" into her church, despite what people thought and said. At various points in their lives, each of these women was either spit on, refused service, fired, asked to leave a public place, yelled at, hated.

And they forged ahead, survived, inspired, because they always needed someone to love. It's all they had. It's all they knew. 

"You are 'different,'" they would tell me. "You need to hear our stories."



I am thankful I listened to these women – around pink Formica dining tables, red gliders overlooking a creek, in innertubes and lawn chairs and the backs of pickup trucks – because their voices now keep me sane, balanced, hopeful, inspired and enveloped in love. 

Because of them, I know the hardest battles come before the biggest victories and that it is a miracle when you are blessed enough to come from a place of such love and acceptance that it not only changes you but that, one ripple, one person, one day at a time, it also changes the world. 

29 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

Thank you for sharing the lessons from your mother and grandmothers,as well as your own.
They were/are right. You are right.
Love is the anly answer.
~ Imagine ~

February 25, 2014 at 8:10 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

February 25, 2014 at 8:10 PM  
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Blogger Natasha Wanderly said...

heal from broken heart" Love spell from dr.Unity brought my husband back"contact Unityspelltemple@gmail.com to help you get your Ex lover back urgently after breakup/divorce"
After 12years of marriage, me and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me and moved to California to be with another woman. I felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he could come back to me, I was really worried and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr Unity can help get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a Love spell for me. 28 hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!! So that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before, All thanks to Dr Unity. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Dr.Unity is real spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are here and you need your ex lover back or save your marriage fast. Do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster Dr.Unity now. Here’s his contact: Call/WhatsApp him: +2348071622464 ,Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com , Website:https://unityspellstemple.blogspot.com ,Your kindness will never be forgotten.

January 16, 2019 at 11:03 PM  
Blogger Natasha Wanderly said...

heal from broken heart" Love spell from dr.Unity brought my husband back"contact Unityspelltemple@gmail.com to help you get your Ex lover back urgently after breakup/divorce"
After 12years of marriage, me and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me and moved to California to be with another woman. I felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he could come back to me, I was really worried and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr Unity can help get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a Love spell for me. 11hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!! So that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before, All thanks to Dr Unity. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Dr.Unity is real spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are here and you need your ex lover back or save your marriage fast. Do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster Dr.Unity now. Here’s his contact: Call/WhatsApp him: +2348071622464 ,Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com , Website:https://unityspellstemple.blogspot.com ,Your kindness will never be forgotten.

January 21, 2019 at 8:52 PM  
Blogger Natasha Wanderly said...

heal from broken heart" Love spell from dr.Unity brought my husband back"contact Unityspelltemple@gmail.com to help you get your Ex lover back urgently after breakup/divorce"
After 12years of marriage, me and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me and moved to California to be with another woman. I felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he could come back to me, I was really worried and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr Unity can help get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a Love spell for me. 11hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!! So that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before, All thanks to Dr Unity. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Dr.Unity is real spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are here and you need your ex lover back or save your marriage fast. Do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster Dr.Unity now. Here’s his contact: Call/WhatsApp him: +2348071622464 ,Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com , Website:https://unityspellstemple.blogspot.com ,Your kindness will never be forgotten.

January 29, 2019 at 12:10 AM  
Blogger micelle anderson said...

Hello everyone my name is Michelle Anderson am from Las Vegas USA. Am here to testify a great and powerful spell caster named DOCTOR IKHINE of Dr.ikhinesolualter@gmail.com I was so confused and devastated when my husband left me for another lady. I needed him back desperately because i loved him so much. So i contacted this great spell caster Dr.ikhine for a help. And he helped me cast a spell on him and just within 48 hours my husband came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness and now we are happily married again. sir am hear shearing your testimony just as i promised. So i want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution. Simply contact the great DOCTOR IKHINE via email:dr.ikhinesolualter@gmail.com or WhatsApp him on +(234)7039543760 from your humble client Michelle Anderson

February 5, 2019 at 4:27 AM  
Blogger micelle anderson said...

Hello everyone my name is Michelle Anderson am from Las Vegas USA. Am here to testify a great and powerful spell caster named DOCTOR IKHINE of Dr.ikhinesolualter@gmail.com I was so confused and devastated when my husband left me for another lady. I needed him back desperately because i loved him so much. So i contacted this great spell caster Dr.ikhine for a help. And he helped me cast a spell on him and just within 48 hours my husband came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness and now we are happily married again. sir am hear shearing your testimony just as i promised. So i want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution. Simply contact the great DOCTOR IKHINE via email:dr.ikhinesolualter@gmail.com or WhatsApp him on +(234)7039543760 from your humble client Michelle Anderson

February 5, 2019 at 4:29 AM  
Blogger Ann Earnis said...

HOW I GOT MY HUSBAND BACK WITH THE HELP OF PRIEST WISDOM CONTACT ON WHATSAPP NUMBER +2348124644470

This is my testimony about the good work of priest wisdom who help me.... I'm ann Earnis from norht carolina USA. And am sorry for putting this on net but i will have to, by this world best spell caster that brought back my husband who left me out for past 3 years, i eventually met this man on a blog site posting by one of is client for help, i explained everything to him and he told me about a spell caster that he had heard about and he gave me an email address to write to the spell caster to tell him my problems. In just 2 days, my husband was back to me. I just want to say thank you to this truthful and sincere spell caster, sir all you told me have come to pass and thank you sir. Please i want to tell everyone who is looking for any solution to their problem, i advice you to kindly consult this spell caster, he is real,he is powerful and whatever the spell caster tell is what will happen, because all what the spell caster told me came to pass. You can kindly contact him on:

his email address is supernaturalspell1@gmail.com or directly on whasapp +2348124644470 or call. PRIEST WISDOM Blog Website: https://supernaturalspell1.blogspot.com/ or http://reallovespellcaster.over-blog.com

February 6, 2019 at 6:10 PM  
Blogger Ann Earnis said...

HOW I GOT MY HUSBAND BACK WITH THE HELP OF PRIEST WISDOM CONTACT ON WHATSAPP NUMBER +2348124644470

This is my testimony about the good work of priest wisdom who help me.... I'm ann Earnis from norht carolina USA. And am sorry for putting this on net but i will have to, by this world best spell caster that brought back my husband who left me out for past 3 years, i eventually met this man on a blog site posting by one of is client for help, i explained everything to him and he told me about a spell caster that he had heard about and he gave me an email address to write to the spell caster to tell him my problems. In just 2 days, my husband was back to me. I just want to say thank you to this truthful and sincere spell caster, sir all you told me have come to pass and thank you sir. Please i want to tell everyone who is looking for any solution to their problem, i advice you to kindly consult this spell caster, he is real,he is powerful and whatever the spell caster tell is what will happen, because all what the spell caster told me came to pass. You can kindly contact him on:

his email address is supernaturalspell1@gmail.com or directly on whasapp +2348124644470 or call. PRIEST WISDOM Blog Website: https://supernaturalspell1.blogspot.com/ or http://reallovespellcaster.over-blog.com

February 6, 2019 at 6:10 PM  
Blogger David Oscar said...

My name is Oscar ,All thanks goes to Dr. OSUKO for saving my marriage from toning apart.i feel so grateful and only have good words about a powerful spell caster named DR.OSUKO who helped me bring back my wife. We had been apart for 4 months, at first I was thinking if I was doing the right thing by contacting a spell caster, but I so much love my wife and won't give her up for anything in this world. I decided to contact osukospelltemple @gmail.com through his mail address I found on several testifiers messages online,and I told him about my situation, he laughed and told me my wife will be back to me in the next 48 hours. I felt it wasn't going to happen at first until my wife called me and was so eager to have me back more than anything on earth.. Now we are together and she cant do without me,and both of us are happy. I feel so happy sharing this testimony because there was no negative act attached to his work. His work was smooth and fast. Thanks to DR.OSUKO for bringing back happiness to my life. I swear with my life that DR.OSUKO is a man to trust and take your problems to. You can contact him on his e-mail if you really truly want your love back.: osukospelltemple @gmail.com,,,

March 5, 2019 at 12:35 AM  
Blogger haley said...

This is a testimony that i will tell to every one to hear. i have been married four 4 years and on the fifth year of my marriage, another woman had a spell to take my lover away from me and my husband left me and the kids and we have suffered for 2 years until i meant a post where this man Dr.JEKWU have helped someone and i decided to give him a try to help me bring my love Husband home and believe me i just send my picture to him and that of my husband and after 48 hours as he have told me, i saw a car drove into the house and behold it was my husband and he have come to me and the kids and that is why i am happy to make every one of you in similar to met with this man and have your lover back to your self His Email: jekwulovespelltemple@gmail.com you can also contact him or whatsApp him on this +1(320) 313-2035 thank so much

March 5, 2019 at 12:36 AM  

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