Wade's Week-Ending Words of Wisdom: Random Friday Thoughts

Friday, October 15, 2010

As I sip on a quad-shot, no-fat, no-whip white chocolate latte -- the sun rising over our beautiful woods, the sugar maples drenched in color, the fog sitting over our neighbor's blueberry fields and pond -- I realize I'm not wearing pants. That I need to let the caffeine fully drench my cells and veins before I start writing anything coherent. So, I start with incoherence ... and without pants. Thus, Wade's Week-Ending Words of Wisdom:

If David Blaine looked like Jon Lovitz (college kids, insert Jonah Hill here; older generation, insert Jack Elam here), would anyone give a damn? (And just admit it: Didn't we all kind of just want him to stay frozen in that block of ice?)

Hollywood, how come every time we start to make out, you grab your gum right back out of my mouth?

DWTS has jumped the shark. But, Hoarders. O, to the M and then the G. And, to the woman whose toilet broke in, like, 1984, so she started pooping in trash bags and threw them in a closet, and said, when they were discovered, "I guess it kinda got outta hand ... but is it really that bad?" ... YOU WIN, OK? And what kind of Glades Plug-In were you using, 'cause I'll buy it, alright?

Social Network is amazing: Not sure of its overall truthiness (I will read the book), but a fascinating portrayal of how Facebook started, and a lasering look at how the world's biggest "social gathering" has really just isolated our society even more. (And, O!M!G! to Jesse Eisenberg. Never doubted I was watching a real guy. I'm sure he'll be overlooked come awards season, though, as he doesn't scream, yell, devolve into histrionics, he just acts his really skinny ass off. Just look at his eyes when he's confronted by his best friend at the end of the movie. Amazing stuff. And hollah to screenwriter Aaron Sorkin, who has so much smart, quick dialogue flowing from the mouths of the actors from second one, that it takes a while for your ears and your brain to catch up to it.)

My Halloween costume has been a month in the works. Suffice to say, I have killed myself to fit into a junior miss size 7. (Yes, it's stretchy material, you catty bitches!)

FOX NEWS ALERT FOX NEWS ALERT BREAKING NEWS BREAKING NEWS!!! I nearly had a stroke -- after being forced to watch Fox News yesterday at the gym as I burned up the elliptical -- believing something awful kept happening in the world, as every five seconds these blazing news alerts -- in bright yellow -- flashed across the screen FOR NO REASON OTHER THAN TO GIVE PEOPLE LIKE MY FATHER A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN AND TO KEEP THEM SCARED FOR THEIR LIVES. Here's a FOX NEWS ALERT: Megyn Kelly should be ashamed of herself, conducting "interviews" as she does. So, had to check out her background: Yep, she's a lawyer.

I think I'm in love with RHofBH ... kicks DC to the curb. Although, I must say, this whole miner soap opera might be the best of them all.

Finally, a serious note: The suicides over the past weeks of youth bullied for being gay -- coupled with the ongoing hate-speak and hatred in our country -- continues to push me to a precipice of uncontrolled rage and overwhelming sadness. My partner and I would not be here today had we not had the strength to see, somehow, someway, that there was a future. I will blog more about this next Wednesday, October 20.

Happy Friday, happy fall, and keep reading!


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